I Love to Hate You

Fluffy and white.

Sometimes sprinkled with cheddar cheese powder.

Sometimes with ranch.

I love you caramelized.

Your fabulosity in the kettle style is a sweet and salty magnificence.

BUT.

BUT.

.
.
.
You pain me.

You give me the aches.

My stomach.

My gums.

Your hulls are shards of glass trapped between my teeth.

Flossing to blood.

Oh glorious popcorn.

How I love to hate thee.

At the movies you tempt me with that buttery scent.

Why oh why do you love to hurt me?

Why?

why?

why?

18 supporters in group:

  1. Tim said...

    Jen this is HILARIOUS! I feel the exact same way. Its funny that your the only person who has brought this up. Popcorn rules in flavor and taste that is, but your right. There is NOTHING worse than those shells getting stuck in your gums, and of course making them bleed. Maybe we can invent a hulless popcorn? LOL

    Love and Prayers,

    Tim

  2. WeaselMomma said...

    Are you always attracted to those who are so bad for you? I'm picturing a tub of popcorn in a leather jacket sitting on a motorcycle.

  3. Martha said...

    LOL, I have the same love/hate relationship with popcorn, but sometimes it is worth any later discomfort. More times than not we don't get popcorn at the movies anymore!

  4. Krystyn @ Really, Are You Serious? said...

    I have the exact same love/hate relationship with popcorn.

    If I eat it on an empty stomach, it's bad!

    But, have you ever been to a popcorn store? They sell more flavors than you can imagine...pickle, jalepeno, salt and vinegar.....so exotic!

  5. Amy Amy Bo Bamey said...

    I was just thinking about this because I got some really good Kettle Corn called Lesser Evil and it was so yummy until I was done and had to pick it out of my teeth for the next hour.

  6. Swirl Girl said...

    I have to go to the dentist today. He's guaranteed to find a kernel from two weeks ago.

    Popcorn has the half life of Urnium.

  7. Stephanie @ BizzieMommy said...

    I love popcorn. I was so mad when they discontinued the white cheddar flavor.

  8. Mama Dawg said...

    I wish I had the never to talk to my popcorn that way. But I'm afraid he'll leave me forever if I do.

  9. Tony@ That One Paticular Harbor said...

    too funny.. and soo true

  10. Sass said...

    It kills me how it always seems like such a good idea to get a gigantic popcorn, lots of butter, at the theater.

    Then afterward, I feel completely nauseated and miserable.

    Yet I do it...again, and again, and again...

    Ugh. ;)

  11. Ann Harrison said...

    No matter what that dang popcorn does to me I just can't give it up.
    Just can't.
    Love it!

  12. Heather of the EO said...

    I love your silliness.

  13. Laura Marchant said...

    I was addicted to the 100 calorie kettle corn. It was so yummy but man I had to stop it was too painful. But now that you mentioned it I might just have to get it next time I go to the store.

  14. Coffee with Cathy said...

    I have a hate/hate relationship with popcorn stemming from being forced to eat it every Sunday when I was growing up. Since my mom declared Sunday was her evening off from kitchen duty and all my dad could fix for my brothers and me was popcorn. I haven't eaten popcorn since I was 12 years old -- and that's a long, long time!

  15. wife.mom.nurse said...

    That's not fair. Not able to eat POPCORN! No, not fair!~

  16. Unknown said...

    You crack me up :) An ode to popcorn, hehe!

  17. Anonymous said...

    o my word.. I seriously died laughing over here.. Popcorn and I have a love hate relationship as well!

  18. Rachel said...

    I ate popcorn every single day for 3 years. My dentist practically BEGGED me to stop because my gums were shredding!

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