A Heart-Breaking Letter

Dear White Wines,

I am so upset.

I don't know what brought this on.

We were so good together.

I hope it's only a temporary separation....I need you back.

I thought my stomach was stronger than that.

Not so much anymore. You now make it churn with pain and angst.

I'm trying, but this relationship just isn't working.

It's me, not you.

I enjoyed holding you in my glass with the long stems.

I loved choosing some of your friends who dressed differently in their unique styles and labels.

I loved the limo wine tours I'd take to find you.

I knew this of REDS, but whites....why? why?

Maybe one day we'll meet again on better terms.

Don't be mad if I start displaying beer bottles in "your spot" on my blog.

I have to do what I have to do.

I will keep you in a special place in my heart.

Sincerely, The Mom

P.S. When you're ready to work this out, give me a sign. I will be there with open arms, and full glass.

64 supporters in group:

  1. ciara said...

    i would ask a question, but i better not. LOL

    i cannot drink alcohol much..few sips and my legs go weak already. of course, the more body fat, the faster you get drunk..hence, 2 sips=tipsy. gone are my skinny days filled w drink. *sigh*

  2. Baseballs and Tutu's said...

    Oh no!!!!!!!

    Not the wine..bless your heart! I will drink a glass for you tonight :)

  3. Sarah said...

    I had to write the same letter to Captain Morgan. Toddies just aren't the same but there are sacrifices we all have to make.

  4. mom3crazygirls said...

    i'm so sad for you. margaritas are still cool with you right?

  5. texasholly said...

    Oh no. This is going to be a difficult separation...

  6. topsytechie said...

    You just can't take it personally...the wines are no respecter of persons. They don't particularly care for me either!

  7. Lisa said...

    White wine is tricky. We had a big fight last year after Hubby's Christmas party.....the white wine won!

  8. QuirkyLoon said...

    Too funny!

    Still laughing!

  9. Brittany said...

    Drink some Blue Moon for me!

  10. Melissa the Careful Wisher said...

    You may have to step down to the "Vodka class." We are a classy group of people! LOL Melissa

  11. Ranch Girl said...

    i'm so sorry - hopefully at some point you and your white wine can get together again

  12. Tracey said...

    I wrote the same letter to red wine!!!

  13. Linda S said...

    Yeah, that happens...but the bubbles in the beer kind of act like alka seltzer. I think that's why they call it "self medicating". You'll be back in the saddle again in no time...until then, I'll just drink for 2...I can do that...

  14. Tena said...

    Oh no!!!
    What an awful time, must be so hard to let something go you love so much!
    Don't give up, the new perfect drink is out there for you... want help finding it? LOL
    Such an enabler, ha ha ha

  15. Tenakim said...

    Oh my- whatever will you do! Do you even like beer? You might have to go to the fruity drinks with me!

  16. anti-supermom said...

    I know, this is me too! It makes me sad just commenting on it. I loved red, then no, I moved on to whites and the same problem is happening.

    I moved on to cider beers and yummy good beer - i.e. not Bud or Busch. I'm a beer snob.

  17. Chelle said...

    Oh, no! My heart is breaking for you, Jen.

    I am hoping that this is a temporary glitch...nothing long term. :)

  18. Desiree said...

    Oh how I miss wine :( red and white alike!

  19. Kelly said...

    i am so sorry for your loss! my thoughts are with you in this time of heartache!!!

  20. Tracey said...

    This makes me sad. *sniff*

  21. Ann said...

    I don't like to cry this early in the morning Jen.
    (*Heavy Sigh*)
    I blame it on hormones!
    (I blame EVERYTHING on hormones.)

  22. The White House said...

    I can't do white wine either. But I think mine has more to do with the fact that my mom and aunt used to drink vats of it and then would breathe all over us with their wine breath when we were kids.

  23. LazyCrazyMama said...

    Oh you poor thing! :( What next?

  24. Jenny said...

    Oooooooo, Jen. I developed a stomach ulcer a couple summers ago because I was hitting the wine bottle. Be careful, and don't take ibuprofen until you figure out what's going on. It will rip you apart and make you feel like Sigourney Weaver's unfortunate friends in "Aliens". Really. I've lived to tell the tale.

  25. Lindsay said...

    ooo the breakup.. such a said day.. I hope you two can work it out!

  26. Haasiegirl said...

    you are a nut.
    trisha
    momdot

  27. tollesons4him said...

    Oh Girl I am so sorry that the "white" is hitting you that way! But I am like that with the Red wines, they don't like me that much!

  28. tollesons4him said...

    Oh Girl I am so sorry that the "white" is hitting you that way! But I am like that with the Red wines, they don't like me that much!

  29. tollesons4him said...

    Oh Girl I am so sorry that the "white" is hitting you that way! But I am like that with the Red wines, they don't like me that much!

  30. Krystyn said...

    Not the white wine? Maybe give it a break, and then you can go back faithfully!

  31. Krystyn said...

    Okay, I totally died reading your hubby's quote for today! I teach chemistry!!

  32. Amy Amy Bo Bamey said...

    I have never been able to do wine, gives me some bad headaches. I stick with Tequila. I prefer doing shots but ill do a girly fruity something with Tequila in it. Lemon Drop Martini and my 2nd go to drink.

  33. Daisy Blue said...

    I've written this same letter to tequila in the past. And vodka. And rum. Now I just stick with beer.

  34. amelia bedelia said...

    Damn the whites for treating you so badly!

  35. Marla said...

    sucks!

  36. Mrs. Schmitty said...

    I'm so sorry! You must be devastated! I only drink Zinfindel, can you handle that?

    Damn wine.

  37. ParentingPink said...

    Oh no not the chardonnay!

  38. Stephanie said...

    *Tear*

    I' too am in the throes of an unrequited love affair with my nightly glass of wine. I love it, but the baby in my tummy? Not so much. Sigh...

  39. Petra said...

    Oh man, I would be VERY upset if this happened to me, with whites or reds! I am saying a wine prayer for you to bring you back on good terms with your old buddy!

  40. topsytechie said...

    2 comments on one post...almost a record for me! But I just had to tell you that I left you a bloggie award at [url=http://topsytechie.wordpress.com]my site[/url]today...enjoy!

  41. Jo-Jo said...

    Oh they do that to me to! AHHH! I drink White Russians...it makes a belly feel good!

    I have something for you over at my blog...Come by and see what it is!

  42. Spice said...

    Oh no, I've had to do this with Tequila after my birthday party last October. Try Blue Moon! It's awesome! http://spiceworld.us

  43. Kristen Andrews said...

    how awful, I will have a glass of red for you! cheers!

  44. Tenakim said...

    just wrote a post inspired by your husband's quote on your sidebar... but like most things I do, it got a little random and I ended up referring to masturbation- and I wanted you to know that I didn't realize that I mentioned your husband and masturbation- sort of in the same breath- not meaning to- and certainly not making any implication towards him, until after I published it! So- to recap- my post is not about your husband masturbating, although it may appear upon first glance that it is.

  45. Tara R. said...

    Say it isn't so! You were such a cute couple... I hope this is just a trial separation. What about Rose'?

  46. Jyl @ MommyGossip said...

    Oh! Man! I had to start a serious diet today. As much as I'd love to lose a few pounds, it is more for my faulty digestive system than the skinny bitch I'd love to be. So... no salt, no milk, no sugar. Kill me now ;)!

  47. Elizabeth said...

    that's sad, very, very sad...

  48. Merrie said...

    I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I would be sad if red and I got too far on the outs, too. Good luck hanging with beer for a while -- that's my favorite backup.

  49. michelle @ sweet mady's said...

    i am not a wine drinker at all, but take away my bacardi's...oh no!

  50. jill jill bo bill said...

    Fat people get drunk faster? No wonder.....that explains.....

    I am sad for you. Really. I won't drink if you can't drink.




    really

  51. jill jill bo bill said...

    okay, I won't drink AS MUCH if you can't drink







    really

  52. jill jill bo bill said...

    (3 sips later) Jenn who?

  53. JenniBeanV said...

    Maybe you need to start sipping other beverages...make white wine come crawling back...

  54. IRISHKAT said...

    Oh no. I will help ease your pain with a tall glass of red :)

  55. beth said...

    Wine and I are having a bit of trouble too. Headaches. Instant headaches. I don;t like it one bit either.

  56. Allison said...

    I just had a 43 week seperation... and that was hard! Hope you find your way back to each other soon!

  57. Shannon said...

    ACK! I don't know what I'd do if this happened with me and my beer! Its what allows me to keep at least a tiny bit of sanity over here!

  58. Sunshine said...

    I could've used this letter about a month ago, when my wine surprised the heck out of me. I've been so good to it too. I didn't deserve to be camped out on my living room floor (thank goodness it was so nearby) all night. That was so not a good look for me.

    We're back together now though, so it's all good.

    I do feel you though. ;D

  59. Average Girl In Average World said...

    I am a weakling. CAN.ONLY.TOLERATE.BEER.


    It's delicious!

  60. Laura said...

    Yea.
    Me too.
    And I hate when all my girlfriends are passing around the bottle at the dinner table and I have to sip on something less offensive to my stomach.
    It's like when you're 13 and everyone else has cherry chapstick and your mom buys you mint flavored.
    You just feel dumb.

  61. Shannon said...

    Oh no!!! That is not right. At all. I would die lately without my white wine (or red, or beer, or anything, really, lol). I hope you find another special drink to make your night :-)

  62. Julie said...

    Dear White Wine: The door is always open at my house. You don't even need to call first. Love, Julie

  63. e.m. said...

    Ah yes..white wine.. back up to its tricks. Yeah.. we broke up in August after I gave in to a second..alright third.. chance. Well the break up was nasty. I was in bad all the next day (*heartbroken*). But alas, I am seeing someone from Mexico with a hint of salt and its been perfect so far!

  64. Rebecca a.k.a. Mum said...

    Uh oh you having problems with you vino...that is not good!

    I hope you can work out what it is, you might be allergic to one of the additives??

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