Casa Chaotic

I have serious CHAOS disorder.

No, not CRS-can't remember sh*t. I have that too, but that's a different post.

CHAOS-Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome! (thanks Flylady.net)

Seriously. I dread having people over.

I mean I love the company and the social part of it all.

But, my house is a mish-mosh of dorm decor, mismatched furniture, stained carpets, and un-classy things.

See how I said "things"...because i'm not even sure what classy is.

Think Pottery Barn, but completely-not-even-close-to that!

In the past 10 years, we've devoted our lives and house to all things children. I've aptly named many our carpet stains as "the stomach flu incident of 2002," "the dropped candle debacle of Easter, 1999," and "unknown issue #245."

Yes, we've gotten our carpets cleaned since all of that. But stains have their way of coming back in our house. That's why we've nearly made all our floors laminate. Carpet is the devil when you have 3 children!

Anyway. I enjoy going to my friend's "Adult Homes" where there is no trace of mess nor toy within a 100 square foot area. You ladies know who you are...Ro! G! K2!

Chalk my issues up to one income, 3 kids, and no decorating sense whatsoever.

Luckily the lava lamp and the futons are hidden in the garage. We only pull out the beer bong when our younger crowd of friends stop by. You know, the little league dads!

But something you'll find all over our walls, besides handprints, dents, dings, and crayon....photos.

Tons and tons of photos. Our personal artwork. Our precious memories.

So what if Pottery Barn didn't throw up in my living room.

Who cares that I don't have anything granite in the house except for the rocks My Boy finds at school.

One day we may have a "Better Homes and Gardens" home....

...but the quiet will be deafening.

The cleanliness will be too tidy.

And, the look will be a bore.

Will it be worth it?

59 supporters in group:

  1. ugagirl30 said...

    Did I write this????

  2. Diane said...

    Did someone say beer bong??!!

    I love having photos and all our original art on our walls too! Pottery Barn is so... carbon copy. Who wants that anyway??

    I think I'd be much more comfortable in your house than in a completely dust free, sterile adult-only home! I actually love looking at the handprints on the walls.

  3. Green said...

    Oh you're not alone..I'm right there with you.
    People can't fault you for making family first, puke second

  4. Brittany said...

    I, too, have the kind of house no one can just drop over to. I need warning. At least 3 plus hours.

  5. Merrie said...

    Awww -- excellent point. Someday you'll miss all the CHAOS, I hear you. Note that I was not listed as a friend with the clean space! ;) You'll see the dents and dings amidst the decorations this Saturday. Also remember that our friends all have help keeping things clean, whereas you and I are on our own! (Some of us with home husbands who aren't exactly working hard at it.)

  6. Heather of the EO said...

    There are so many stains in our living room carpet that it appears to be brown. It's not. It's tan.

    I dream of order because I like it, but I don't want to trade our full house for it.

    I will still picture myself in a house from Cottage Living though. I'm there and my kids are grown and I'm sipping coffee with my feet up. But my boys call me. They call me ALL the time and come home every weekend. Whew...

  7. WeaselMomma said...

    I strive and fail at finding a happy medium.

  8. jill jill bo bill said...

    AWW Jen, that is so FUNNY!!! That's why you only ask people who are crappy housekeepers so you look like Martha. Duh!

  9. Anonymous said...

    PLEAE go back and read my post under ATWT titled Mom, Mommy, mama, Just don't call me late for dinner.

    P.S. - You are not alone, I am here with you (along with most of people ages 20-40)....

  10. Brooks said...

    it is totally not worth it!!!!!! totally NOT...My carpet is the same. I can shampoo them and 2 days later the stains reppear....its like they were hiding and then felt it safe to return!
    Pottery Barn is to damn over priced anyway!

    it is cute though......dammit!

  11. Tenakim said...

    I must admit, I don't suffer from CHAOS- I am always compnay ready and my house is kind of picture perfect all the time- sorry- it's a sickness, too. I don't envy the carpet- we have hardwood everywhere except bedrooms and there has been one puke incident in 3 years that we've been here- I still don't like to go in that room!

  12. April said...

    You may have a "Better Homes and Gardens" home one day, but then your grandchildren will show up to ruin it!!! Last week my 5 year old puked on the MIL's nice beige carpet!!!

    I'm sure that I will miss the dirty little fingerprints all over the house one day!

  13. MommaSuds said...

    I say no! I love to have stuff but I think it is much more fun to have a house full of kids and friends. My house is nice enough with my auction bought orange furniture(I do have matching curtains that are awesome)

    The pictures all over the walls is good for me!!

  14. Joanna said...

    I love this post. I usually have CHAOS as well, but I can't imagine it any other way. I got a little teary eyed at the end when you described the quiet of the Pottery Barn house... I am not looking forward to those days!

  15. Anonymous said...

    Great post Jen and so true!

    I, too, suffer from CHAOS!

    I would be happy to meet somewhere in the middle: not so much mish-mash and not uber BHG.

  16. Pam said...

    if you ever see my house, you would ask me what i do all day. i'll tell you. absolutely nothing. you have a toddler...you have an excuse for mess lol my kids? half grown & still can't pick up after themselves. i clean, but why bother, when no one wants to help maintain it. but i get ya, once their gone, we're gonna mess the chaotic mess & noise. shoot, when 21 yr old left to go back to vegas, it took awhile before i stopped expecting him to come home from work and having mother & son time watching coney (conan obrien)or making 7-11 runs lol i might be a hot mess when the girls are gone :-/

  17. Tony@ That One Paticular Harbor said...

    If precious memories are un-classy, I don't want to know class. Visitors are just that, visitors. If you are happy with your surrounding who cares what others think. Life is to short to please everyone.

  18. Minxy Mimi said...

    Kids and decorating dont really work well together!
    Pottery Barn is overrated anyways, IMO...too cookie cutter~

  19. Unknown said...

    I personally love the toys that decorate my floors.. although I could live without my 2 year old's new way of decorating with boogers. I also can't have ANY decorations on our entertainment center, our house is so blah. lol

  20. Aria said...

    CHAOS disorder, is that what we're calling it...? Cool by me, I've got it in spades. We've got indoor-outdoor carpeting in the living/computer rooms~ stained of course~ and not enough room to seat 4 adults... OK, yes 4, but only if we kick out my son and his playpen... In my defense, my hubby inherited this house from his mom, and I've done the best possible with it since I've gotten here... I found that the MOMA posters of Monet helped tremendously in covering the spots on the walls that had things on them when his mom lived here and smoked like a chimney inside the house... Yeah. Guess we could always get together, break out the beer bong and laugh our asses off about the state of our decors...

  21. ♥ Braja said...

    My house is fine; no kids, and no clutter...I love my decor. I welcome anyone, but random visitors scare me. Sometimes they don't leave.... :)))

  22. Melissa ♥ Spoiled Mommy said...

    Oh my gosh...this sounds EXACTLY like my house...even down to the 3 kids, one income. Nothing matches cause it was either given or bought at different times. I wont take "counter" pictures cause I thought I was the only one w/out a granite counter. haha!
    And as picky as I am, I cant find anything better to put on my walls other than the pictures I take.
    I love this post!!

  23. Christie said...

    I think you are my living my life, only in a different state. It is simply amazing how much clutter young children can bring into a home. But what is, is. And I know when they grow up and leave the home, I will be wishing for the finger painteds hand on the wall and dog, milky spills on the table, and the giggles as they did wrong in another room.

  24. kel said...

    I'm right there with ya!! I am actually thinking of starting Flylady on Monday.. do you do it?

    I really need to just focus on one room at a time and get it set the way I want! You wanna hear something sad? We have lived in this house for 4 years and I have never bought curtains!!! I am just not into decorating, but now that I am a stay at home mom, I need to make more of an effort.

  25. Mama2hre said...

    NO! It's perfect the way it is! And, apparently just like ours! This AM a friend's new fiance stopped by to drop off some work for me to finish. I've been in training all week. So, the sink was filled with dishes, dog hair was floating around on the floor, laundry piled in the mudroom, etc. I cringed when he came near the house and then all but plowed him over as I blocked the door, so he wouldn't try to enter and make himself comfy. Not that he would want to after actually seeing the house. But I know someday this will all be a distant memory and I'll be sad looking back saying, "Remeber when..." So I too need to learn to embrace my family home! :)

  26. Unknown said...

    Well we don't have kids but i can relate sort of with 3 dogs! lol

  27. Jen said...

    I can totally relate. My house is not at all what I wish it was. It isn't so much my kids as it is my cats. They are the worst culprit.

    I think CHAOS is all in our minds. Unless you live like those people on the clutter shows (you know the ones that have stuff everywhere and they can't even walk in the room) I'm sure your house is presentable enough for your friends to drop by. Real friends aren't looking at carpet stains and tacky decor. They are there to enjoy your company.

    I need to remind myself of this because I tend to shut myself in and not have people over because I believe that I live in CHAOS too. It is actually pretty sad when I think about it.

    Great post!

  28. Ranch Girl said...

    My casa is a bit chaotic lately - looks as if Santa threw up in our living room!

  29. Unknown said...

    We can relate. We always talk about "someday" in the future when we move into our next house, that is when we will go about decorating, and keeping the kids toys off the floor, and even keep up more with vacuuming and dusting... We don't invite many people over.

  30. Unknown said...

    My husband has issues with the house and people coming over...Me I clean every day, after everyone...would my house be featured in BHG...no. But my house is NOT dirty...all I ask is that food is put away, and the toilet is flushed...there's always room for friends!!

  31. Anna Lefler said...

    OMG, you have read my mind with this one! I dread it like death - the preparations for guests. It's, um, not worth it!

    However...I read a lovely essay by Erma Bombeck - that she wrote later in life - about all the things we put off or avoid that we shouldn't. It helped me loosen up a bit about having things perfect before inviting friends over. I mean, it didn't CURE me (snort) but it sure choked me up and made me think...

    Fabulous post!

    XO

    Anna

  32. tiarastantrums said...

    oh man do I hear you on this one - add a dog in there too! I used to have a nice house and nice things - until I had children - now my house has been taken over by random socks and underwear, toys and dog hair and blankies and more toys!!

  33. I Am Boymom said...

    I am so domestically challenged on so many levels. I am with you on this one, Jen. one of these days maybe I'll figure it out. In the meantime I keep praying that one of my clean freak friends will take pity on me and come help me get organized. It'll only last 2 weeks, but it'll be a nice 2 weeks.

  34. Rebecca said...

    I hear ya lady, we dont have much high class stuff either.

    BUT, I told hubby when we get out of the military (in either 2 or 5 years), and we finally get to buy our 1st house, I am going to go out and buy a whole NEW house of furniture!!! :)

  35. Stacy Uncorked said...

    I have a CHAOS disorder too! I only have one child (two if you add my hubby in the mix...heh, heh!) Before I got married and had a child, I never worried about friends and family just 'dropping by' - everything was in its place and my house was always clean...now I need some serious forewarning so I can at least get the tornado of toys cleaned up so no one hurts themselves walking through the living room! LOL!

    I love your blog, immensely enjoy reading it, and have left an award for you over at my blog - feel free to stop by anytime to pick it up! Thanks for the enjoyable posts!

  36. SuZ said...

    I am right there with you... so right there with you. My house is nothing even close to Pottery Barn... and probably never will be. But that's okay with me :)

  37. mom3crazygirls said...

    Amen sister!!!

  38. Ann On and On... said...

    The grass is not greener if you ask me. Making little messy memories is what it is all about. Friends do not care. Invite them over, talk, laugh and reminisce about the stains if needed. :D Perfect is boring.

  39. Swirl Girl said...

    Love how you name your stain!

    We travel in the same circles here in bloggy world...and I can't believe I've never been here before!

    Off to read more!

  40. katana750 said...

    Thanks for writing such wonderful posts. I have passed along an award for you over on my site. Please pick it up when you have time.
    Ken @ Dadtotwo.com

  41. jen aka mommay said...

    I'm usually right there but with Thanksgiving, my cookie exchange and Christmas party...my house is looking pretty OK most of the time!

    Now the CRS...that's a whole 'nother story these days! Where is my brain?

  42. Unknown said...

    That is so our house! That's why I like Christmas so much, the overkill of decorations help to hide things!

  43. artfuldelight said...

    I can completely relate to your house that is how mine is. Besides or couches that match everything else is hodge podge. I love it though. I grew up in a white glove house (my step-mom came after my cleaning with a white glove to make sure it was clean) there were rooms that you couldn't go in. You could always see the vacuum marks. I didn't want my kids to live like that. So I am content with my house just the messy way it is.

  44. Caffeine Court said...

    You've gotta love the Fly Lady!

    It sounds like you and I are kindred spirits!

    With 3 dogs a cat and 2 children, I struggle constantly with clutter, dog hair and with a puppy, dog pee!

    It's hard. I'm trying to lighten up about people coming over, but it seems in my town everyone has these perfect houses. I don't know how they do it.

  45. Krystyn @ Really, Are You Serious? said...

    All I have to say is...I can relate.

  46. Leanna said...

    OK, I 'tried' to start Flylady once, trying to be what I am so obviously NOT...lol. I already can't fit everything I need to into my 24 hours and that is without all the obsessive cleaning. Not to mention you add 3 boys (4 if you count Hubby)& there is no hope. ;)

    So, aren't our homes just 'lived in'? That is always what I've been told. (I prefer to believe this instead of facing the truth that it is just too cluttered)LOL.

  47. Anonymous said...

    I am totally feeling you on this post! When my husband asked me what I wanted for Christmas, no lie I told him a steam cleaner for the carpet. It is disgusting! Who knew Play-Doh could stain? Now I have green dots on the grey carpet. Not a good look at all! :)I have to strategically place furniture over the spots until we get the carpet cleaned. But such is life when you have kids, right?

    Tara
    http://theyoungmommylife.com

  48. JenEverAfter said...

    Well, eventually they'll be a wee bit older and a little less pukey, and then maybe you'll have the best of both worlds!

  49. Colleen - Mommy Always Wins said...

    "Put together" houses are overrated. That's MY story anyway!

  50. Jenni said...

    I can't have people over, either. Between the kids and the dogs and the husbands...it's always a mess.

  51. Linda S said...

    this is why there are no pictures of the inside of my house on my blog...

    24 hour notice required...or you may not have an empty clutter free surface to sit on.

  52. Anonymous said...

    Y'know Jen I fight this battle internally all the time. I have spent years and countless arguments over perfecting my house. I want a mix of 'people live here' and 'adults won't be grossed out'. Aside from that, I maintain a tidy house. Which I only know because guest always comment on the cleanliness. But, I never feel like it is good enough, pretty enough, clean enough. It is a never win battle. And as a sahm you have nothing but time to think about it. It's where you are most. Really, I find its a short track to crazy town.

  53. flickrlovr said...

    Hmmm, sounds familiar...

  54. Paul Eilers said...

    We have the stained carpet thing down pat. We even bought a carpet cleaner, but our little man manages to stay one step ahead of us.

    Merry Christmas!

  55. Shannon said...

    I firmly believe that having kids and pets are not conducive to having carpeting in your house. I badly want to rip it out and get hardwood flooring put in!

    Maybe one day...

  56. Jill said...

    I just envy that you have a place to call your own...

  57. Anonymous said...

    All of those things are what makes a house a HOME. I would much rather hang at your house than somewhere that feels like a museum. Stop stressing it!

  58. Ann(ie) said...

    Same carpet issue here. I'm embracing the stains. I think I'll start naming them, too. :)

  59. Anonymous said...

    Couldn't have said it better myself. I like to think that my 2 boys keep my inner perfectionist in it's place. :)

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