Her Way or the Highway

My precious 2 year, 4 month old daughter is a control freak. She likes what she likes and there's no budging on how things should be in her eyes. I love it when she yells at me with her incoherent K-lish toddler talk, "mooooom! by-me-pay-you-dolyee, ready?" Surprisingly 'ready' is the one word that is articulated, and it's a question, so I am pretty sure answering YES will satisfy her.

But there is a method to her madness. Things need to be right or she's flails, then screams, then the steam blows powerfully out of her ears. Here's a list of things K needs for a succesful play interaction.

* anyone playing with her needs to hold the dog, bear, life-size Strawberry Shortcake dolyee (dolly), turtle or other inanimate plaything and talk through it with a high pitched voice to K

* any dolyee needs to be upright, eyes pointed at K, and moving. She may not rest, sleep, or god-forbid hide under a blanket.

* when playing on the Little People ehmaine (airplane), you may NOT put a dog in the pilot's seat or use the stairs to enter the plane.

* Honey the horse is a Strawberry Shortcake character and is NOT allowed on the LP ehmaine, how could I even think it?

* when playing the keyboard, the volume must be on the highest level for proper dance moves to be made. If I turn it down, a cry of "noooo, yowder!" ends my turn as the d.j.

* when playing in the LP house, I must continuously knock on the door and say "HELLOO" every 5 seconds, but I may not enter the house. If I try I'm pushed out.

*interactions need to be repeated, on average, 25 times each or a shouting match will ensue

*if books are upside-down when K is "reading" them, do not change it, she reads differently than you and I, it's a talent

*you may not be on the ladder to the slide at the same time she is and watch out if you speed up it and pass her to slide down like My Boy does...Flips.Out.

*if she is singing the words to a song that it is on, you may not under any circumstances be singing at the same time

*if you are DQ or My Boy and your face gets within an inch of hers, you will be slapped but if you fake cry (or really cry) she'll say "wowry" (sorry)

Don't say I didn't warn you.

27 supporters in group:

  1. Alice said...

    My daughter went through a really weird obsessive-compulsive stage where all underwear had to match her pajamas and she didn't want to wrinkle the blanket on her bed so she slept on top of it. Then she'd call us in the middle of the night to straighten it out again. Bizarre. At least she's over all that now. I think.

  2. Neurotically Yours: said...

    You deserve a #1 Mom award for being able to remember all of K's rules....but actually articulating them.....you deserve some girl time.....I send you to see Sex and the City tonight as your reward - lol!!!

  3. Sue said...

    OMG I remember when my daughter was 3-4 and she'd make me play Barbie. I'd just sit there holding the thing and she's go "talk your girl, Mom!!! Talk your girl!"

  4. Amber said...

    Sounds like you have your hands full :) At least she knows what she wants. I call my girl the Diva and she is only 13 months. All I can say is look out world. Thanks for all you comments on my blog I appreciate them.

  5. Kelly said...

    That sounds just like my home, with my 3 year old son.. if I don't crash the hotwheels with good sound effects and show enthusiasm..he'll brake down and go in hysterics.

  6. Sarah McBride said...

    oh my gosh, your daughter reminds me SO MUCH of my own kids. They too were control freaks about playtime/social interaction.
    thanks for the chuckle. Glad to know I am not the only one who went through that!!

  7. *Becky* said...

    How cute is this??? HAHAHHA

  8. Merrie said...

    LOL I think she and my daughter would butt heads. N's not nearly as specific, but probably wouldn't enjoy all the direction. ha!

  9. Tenakim said...

    Yeah, my 3 yr old, "Beebs" is exactly like this- so much so that I was constructing a post much like this, but then I was afraid of her coming off a little too kooky (hers are much worse than K). She's been "particular" since she was one. I actually did research and ask dr.s about autism, but that was ruled out, for one, because of her verbal skills. In our house, everyone knows her goofy quirks and work around them- it's better than the fit that would follow- as they say- pick your battles!

  10. The Walsh's said...

    You need to make a rule book for kids that come over for playdates. Then make them read it while holding the book upside down...It's good practice for things to come.

    P.S. Even if I didn't like what you wrote every day, I'd come to hear your new choice of song. We have the exact same taste in music.

  11. Ann said...

    "Noooo, yowder!" Is my new catch phrase!
    Love it!!!
    I wish we lived closer so I could come over and play too, now that I know the rules.

  12. Chels said...

    Cute post!

  13. ali said...

    And, Jen, how many times do you put Honey the Horse on the airplane just to push her buttons?

    Bothering our kids can be so much fun sometimes!

  14. Not Just Any Jen said...

    With all that play, how do you find time to blog? Good Mommy!

  15. Corey~living and loving said...

    I wrote a post similar to this back when my girl was that age. She has super powers to "know it all" and I was "mama doesn't have a clue". Playing with her during that stage was difficult. I never seemed to get it right. Luckily things are better in that department these days.
    I think toddlers go though this just trying to have some sort of control in their lives. It is natural, but annoying sometimes.

  16. SherE1 said...

    All my girls were the same way at that age! My 4 YO STILL won't let her daddy sing with her. If she's in a good mood, maybe myself or her sisters can. But NEVER daddy!

  17. LiteralDan said...

    I can very much sympathize with you on most counts. My (4YO) son, if not my (1YO) daughter, seems to have inherited my OCD.

    The singing police thing is especially familiar. I'm not sure why he insists on solos-- you'd think he was Barbra Streisand or something.

  18. Karen MEG said...

    Aren't little divas sweet? My 3 yo is loving every minute of it; her big brother and parents, NOT so much.

    I love your profile BTW; I would pick that bottle of vino up too!

    Happy weekend!

  19. Danielle said...

    Sounds like K is a ball! LOL! Aiden has some of these special talents too. specifically the singing when he is ... Boy - watch out. ah, isn't this age fun

  20. Shannon said...

    My two year old is the same way - so fascinating to try to keep up with said rules, lol. I've been reading your blog for a while and really enjoy it!! I'm a friend of Rebecca's (musings of a mum of 4) so I thought I'd come out and comment finally!

  21. Christina said...

    Sounds so much like my little princess, too! She has very prcise ideas about her world.

  22. LaskiGal said...

    So you post those toddler-olicies (policies by toddler) somewhere?

    You know, I'm thinking a few of these applied to my students--as in senior students in high school--for instance, repeating things like 25 plus times!

    Wow! I can't wait for the terrific twos!!!

  23. Rebecca A.K.A. Mum said...

    LOL love this post Jen, K sounds like a real little character!
    Thankfully having my 3 so close together they all play together ALL the time, when I try and join in I am looked at like I am *intruding*. :(
    haha

    Ahhh the joys (and not so much) of motherhood right! :)

  24. Cranky Mom said...

    I loved it! My daughter, 3, has very precise rules too. My son, 5, not so much. But if you break the rules, she gets very angry and makes you go back and re-do it anyway. The My Little Ponies CANNOT PLAY in the Dora stable, god forbid. The ponies like pink and purple, but not Dora's orange stable. She will only wear pink underwear because that is what princesses wear. Thanks for the reminder that these quirks are supposed to be cute.

  25. Susiewearsthepants said...

    Don't ya just love the twos! That is one age you could not pay me to revisit.

  26. Kate said...

    hehe she and D would get along great :)

  27. JanMary said...

    Great blog - found you through Adoptic. Just past the 2's for the third time - it will end.......eventually :)

    I love how your blog roll includes the latest post - is that hard to set up?

    PS I'll be back!

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