The One Where I Fight a Young Boy
A simple night.Cousin T slept over Friday night. The boys played Batman and Indiana Jones, watching Clone Wars on TV. Normal right?
We head over to the local pizza place for dinner. Everyone likes pizza, thank goodness for the miracle food. There are few that fit the bill for our family.
As we're finishing up, in walks a family of 3 boys and a mom. One very sassy young lad struts over to the table next to us and gives My Boy and T a look-down of a wolf eyeing his prey.
WTF comes over my face and mind. I watch intently as my nephew whispers under his breath..."that's the school bully."
Um huh?! I ask him, but he brushes the comment off and I let it alone.
One last run to refill the sodas, the boys walk off and I hear one of the boys at the next table comment. "That kid [my nephew] goes to my school. It's Harry Potter."
OH NO YOU DI'NT!
Mamma Bear mode kicks in and I stare this boy down with a look that could melt steel. Remember, my nephew wears glasses, round ones.
"You better keep your mouth shut!" comes out of my mouth before my brain registers it so wrong and so inappropriate. Oh thank goodness his mother is at the salad bar.
My brain still disfunctional..."if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all!!"
The boy looks at me with dread and may just start crying.
OMG. What did I just say to this child?
Hubby looks at me and gives me the what did you do? look.
Soon after My Boy and T return to the table and that kid's mom sits down with her salad. No eye contact is made from the boys back at us for the next 10 minutes.
I was half afraid that this kid was going to rat me out to his mom and she'd stick her fork in my eye, but he knew he was being a TWIT and probably completely embarassed to speak another word.
I'm a very emotional, sensitive person. I cannot handle anyone one close to me being called names or made fun of. I acted a tad inappropriately, but then again, so did this kid. I just felt I needed to let him know it wasn't okay.
October 6, 2008 at 2:55 AM
Good for you!!! I think more people should stand up when kids say stuff like that - it's really rotten. I'm glad you didn't get a fork in the eye - it would have made for interesting talk at the pizza place ;-)
October 6, 2008 at 3:33 AM
haha! good for you! now when he picks on the kids at school they have some defense ("my mom/aunt made him cry!"). i would have said worse!
October 6, 2008 at 4:48 AM
YES!!! I dont let kids bully either. i WILL say something. even if it isnt my kid they are bullying. I dont put up with that crap. Something in my brain takes over and I say stuff before I can stop myself. Now I just accept the fact that I am a psychotic mother bear.
October 6, 2008 at 4:54 AM
I got you on that one...I probably would have done the same thing...but next time you need to completely throw the kid off and say something like 'Cool right...HP Rocks!!'
See you let him know that what he did was complitment T..not insult!!
October 6, 2008 at 5:07 AM
Good for you!, Put that little snot in his place.
October 6, 2008 at 5:08 AM
I think that mother should be embarrassed that her son is mean to others and considered the class bully.
It's not like you smacked him upside the head, you just corrected bad behavior. I don't think I would have the nerve to do it, but I wish I would. It sounds like you might even have had an effect on that kid. Maybe he will remember that next time he tries to bully someone. You could have actually improved his life. You are such a philanthropist!
October 6, 2008 at 5:14 AM
good on you! Just shows that bullies really are weak when someone comes back at them.
I found you via Linda at Short Pump.
October 6, 2008 at 5:23 AM
Good for you! I think you gave the kid the perfect amount of menace and civility. I doubt he will have the nerve to insult another kid in front of a parent anytime in the future. I'm curious for a follow-up on how your son's day was at school today, though.... Did your son have anything to say about it, or did he not see you?
October 6, 2008 at 5:30 AM
Hello! I'm a new reader with three kids as well and I have to say I have you beat. LOL, I threatened a 10 year old with a beating with my stiletto if he made my then 4 year old and his friends cry again. LOL, his mom actually laughed at him though b/c she told him to "be nice." There is no need for kids to be so nasty at such a young age! :)
October 6, 2008 at 5:32 AM
Great job! You get major kudos for that one! I just dealt with a bully on the bus re: my daughter. Believe me, like you, I "take no prisoners!" I have a zero tolerance policy for bullies, especially when it comes to my own kids! Way to go!
October 6, 2008 at 5:54 AM
I did pretty much the same thing to a kid at the mall play area a few weeks ago after he started to put his foot in the middle of Munch's chest to push her out of a climber he was on. The look I gave him actually made him move to the opposite side of the play area and avoid me and mine at all costs. I plan to wear my kids out if they ever act like that! But it really makes you want to wear the parents out for not teaching thier children better.
October 6, 2008 at 5:58 AM
I am also a new reader and think you did just the right thing. My hubby would have been giving me that look too though.
October 6, 2008 at 6:00 AM
Git R' Done!!!
Maybe thats what that kid needed. Most of the time, the bully's parents have no idea how their child is acting until they get beat up or suspended from school. I'd say you saved that boy from a good 'ol whooping from one of his victims!
October 6, 2008 at 6:20 AM
Kudos to you.
I'm SO the 'group parent' whenever we're out. I have no shame in telling kids which end is up if they're interfering with my brood.
More people should be so vigilant.
October 6, 2008 at 6:44 AM
Been there. Done that. My neighbor girl just turned 6. B/C she is shy her parents heldher back for kindy. My dot is 5. They are in kindy together. The 6 yo is a sweetie. Her big sis is a brat. When 6 yo started riding her bike w/o training wheels big sis came over and asked my dot why she couldn't do it and that she shouldn't try b/cit was too hard and she prob wasn't good enough to do it. Before I knew what hit me ( it was just me, dot and big sis-not 6 yo) I said " Well, your sister is almost a whole year older than D. So, D has a lot of time to learn it still before she is 6 yo's age. I know it is confusing b/c your sister and D are in kindy together,but D is going at 5 instead of 6."
Shameful, I know.
October 6, 2008 at 6:48 AM
Good for you... I am glad you said something to him. It makes me so mad when kids are mean. Really, I wished you'd slapped him, but that really might have gotten you the fork in the eye.
October 6, 2008 at 6:52 AM
OMgawsh Jen! We are on the same wavelength this morn! I cyber swear to you I posted my post BEFORE I read your blog!
I'm glad you did what you did. Good for you!
October 6, 2008 at 6:57 AM
Way to go Aunt Jen! I think that it helps the kids to learn to stick up for themselves too when they see the parents/aunts/elders sticking up for them! Kids learn by watching.....Good for you!
October 6, 2008 at 7:30 AM
I've done that more times than I would like to admit. You did the right thing. Good for you.
October 6, 2008 at 7:34 AM
I think I would have reacted the same way. I am sure the school bully has heard all of things said nicely to him so he maybe he needed it said w/ the look that could melt steal. :-)
October 6, 2008 at 7:34 AM
Good for you! The boys on my street are scared to death of me for the way I would get on them for teasing my daughter. I know you would have taken on the Mom and she probably would have been horrified and reprimanded her son. I say call the little boogers out!!
October 6, 2008 at 7:36 AM
Man your lucky. I would have said it front of his mom!
October 6, 2008 at 7:38 AM
I love it - there needs to be more words said to children like this!! It is hard enough being a kid!!
October 6, 2008 at 7:42 AM
OMG- I've so been there! It bothers me that moms don't notice what's going on!
October 6, 2008 at 7:46 AM
Good for you! you are my hero, I wish I could have done that. I hope he leaves your nephew alone now!
October 6, 2008 at 8:08 AM
Good for you for sticking up for your nephew! I would have acted the same way, and not thought twice about it, hehehehe.
October 6, 2008 at 8:12 AM
I've always wanted to yell (or just snap at) these snotty kids who make snide remarks under their breath.
My 5 year old told me last week that a "friend" in her class was being mean to her and was going to tattle on her for not drawing her picture correctly. Seriously? I so wanted to go to the teacher myself and complain how upset my munchkin was with her "friend"...
Then I realized she's 5... and I'm well, not.
But I SO wanted to! I bet it felt great!
October 6, 2008 at 8:21 AM
Good for you... kids can be cruel, and I can;t believe this one said something like that in ear shot of an adult... you did the right thing, nobody says mean things about my babies!!!
October 6, 2008 at 8:29 AM
I totally echo what everyone else has said.
You go Momma Bear!
October 6, 2008 at 8:37 AM
Whoo Hoo! He needed it! SOme little kids are just jerks and need for someone to put them in their place because they're parents probably think its cute and don't care about the effect the "bully" has on other kids.
October 6, 2008 at 8:39 AM
That is EXACTLY what you should have done; if his Mama isn't going to raise him to be nice, someone needs to let him know that type of behavior is WRONG!!!!
Following In My Shoes
October 6, 2008 at 9:13 AM
You did the right thing Jen, that is probably what the kid needed to hear anyway he knew what he did was wrong. GOOD FOR YOU!!
October 6, 2008 at 9:13 AM
I cracked up at the fork in your eye comment. I would have done the same thing. Maybe even had said something in earshot of mom about bullies. But I'm wenchy like that.
October 6, 2008 at 9:36 AM
Aw, I have btdt... Don't beat yourself up so much. The kid had it coming... :-)
October 6, 2008 at 9:48 AM
I probably would have said something too. He needs to learn to be nice.
October 6, 2008 at 9:50 AM
Go, Jen!! I am glad you put the bully in his place.
Maybe NOW he will think twice before being mean to another kid...and seriously, did he honestly think he could get away with it with you right there?!
October 6, 2008 at 9:57 AM
Oh Jen...you crack me the hell up! I'm the same way, I would have done the same thing, and Erik also would have given me the "What did you do?" look. I'm proud of you, because, really? These bullies aren't told enough that the way they act is wrong.
October 6, 2008 at 10:00 AM
It's ok. You didn't say anything wrong at all. If you'd cussed him out that would be fun and all but bad. You said something that needed to be said.
October 6, 2008 at 10:29 AM
I sooooo would have said something too! It is good for a bully to be put in his place. Kudos to Jen!!!
October 6, 2008 at 10:43 AM
Haha, I would have done pretty much the same thing ^_^ I am a big believer in telling off other people's children if they are being little brats :D
October 6, 2008 at 10:56 AM
Good for you! Nobody likes a bully.
October 6, 2008 at 11:26 AM
You're awesome! Good for you for speaking up, I hope that jerk kid learned a lesson, he APPARENTLY gets away with treating others badly, so it's time someone put him in his place.
October 6, 2008 at 11:35 AM
you F-ing ROCK, lady.
Bruiser moms RULE.
;-)
J
October 6, 2008 at 11:40 AM
First, I love the title to this post, very Friends-esque! Second, good for you!
October 6, 2008 at 11:41 AM
I've been known to blurt stuff like that out to kids too and then worry about a fork being stuck in my eye. Still, it sounds like the kid needed a good talking to, and I hope it worked!!
October 6, 2008 at 11:43 AM
That Mama Bear sometimes just has to come out - grrrrr!
October 6, 2008 at 12:01 PM
Way to go!!! Good Job! Team work and all of that! If other parents aren't going to take it upon themselves to teach their kids manners and common decency then I guess it is up to the rest of us.
October 6, 2008 at 12:34 PM
I had to laugh. That is something I would have totally done and my man would have been totally embarrassed! LOL I hate that some kids can be so mean. And to hear he was the school bully, has to be a reflection on the way he's being raised! So sad.
October 6, 2008 at 12:38 PM
you go mommy! I couldn't of helped myself either, he totally deserved a little bit of mommy discipline! XO, C
October 6, 2008 at 1:24 PM
Hey, it's probably the first time in a while that a grown up put him in his place. At the very least, he probably never got it from a stranger before, and maybe he'll think twice next time.
I hate bullies!
October 6, 2008 at 2:21 PM
You rock! Good for you!
October 6, 2008 at 2:51 PM
As a former chubby kid who got picked on relentlessly in middle school I say good for you! I would have done the same thing! At least your nephew looks like a famous character in a book! I think this kid is jealous!
October 6, 2008 at 2:53 PM
Woohoo! You go girl. You know that kid's mom probably doesn't tell him to watch his mouth nearly enough if he is the school bully. *applause*
October 6, 2008 at 4:58 PM
First of all, I HEART your new header! That's really gorgeous.
Secondly, THANK YOU for standing up for your kid. I think too many parents are afraid of confrontations with kids. Kids need to learn that they are responsible for their actions and behaviors and you can't go around crapping on other kids and not expect to be told to knock it off.
I'm all for kids learning to handle issues on their own, but sometimes they also need to know that you've got their back.
October 6, 2008 at 5:20 PM
Oh girl. I totally would have done the same thing. Bullies need to learn that adults are watching. And, if he'd told his Mom, that would have opened the door for you to talk to her about what her kid has been doing. Just before you dodge the fork coming at you :)
October 6, 2008 at 5:25 PM
You're my hero!! and I'm sure you are in your nephews eyes too.
October 6, 2008 at 5:26 PM
YAY!! You rock, I would have done this too! Someone needed to say something to him!
October 6, 2008 at 5:56 PM
I would have done the same thing!
October 6, 2008 at 6:24 PM
ha! I thought you would have him down on the ground wailing on him if he said another word...
Totally justifiable.
October 6, 2008 at 6:27 PM
love this... i would have done the same thing...
October 6, 2008 at 6:32 PM
I don't even know what I would do. I'm pretty sure I would have said something, though. That little turd needs to know that's not funny!
October 6, 2008 at 7:05 PM
You're human Jen. And you're a fantastic mom. And...
you DEFINITELY showed that boy that his words/actions weren't OK.
Yeah for Momma Bear!!!
(Geez, what if that boy HAD told his mom?! What would you have done? I'm getting anxious thinking about it.)
You're so cool!
October 6, 2008 at 7:06 PM
No lapse in judgement!!!
GOOD FOR YOU!!!!
There are times when kids like that need to be put in their place before it gets out of hand!
Good job!
October 6, 2008 at 7:26 PM
Ha! Good for you. There is way too much bullying going on these days and its at darn near every grade level, so I think you did the right thing. Not enough parents stand up and do the right thing so thanks for setting the bar.
October 6, 2008 at 7:45 PM
Good for you! I would have done the same thing--nobody talks trash about my kids!!
October 6, 2008 at 7:56 PM
jen, your better then me. I would be known to pick his ass up and beat it. LOL! No really, i have corrected kids for smart mouthing too in public by saying something to them. (check my chuck e cheese post). Good for you to stand up for your nephew.
btw, check the momdot contest announcements. Your name was pulled.
trisha
October 6, 2008 at 8:45 PM
Hi there,
I've added your button on my blog.Would you be willing to exchange buttons.
Blog Contest Station
October 6, 2008 at 9:35 PM
Good for you! Love the Mama Bear in you....I have it too. I'm afraid I'll roar sometime when I shouldn't, but I can't stand the mean-spirited-ness and bullying. Maybe the mean kid will think twice!
www.extraordinarymommy.com
October 6, 2008 at 10:21 PM
Not inappropriate, the kid needed to be corrected.
A fork in the eye though....maybe not so appropriate.
October 7, 2008 at 12:13 PM
I get the same way when I hear stuff like that and I've said some of the same stuff. Hopefully you made that kid think twice from now on and he'll stop being a bully!
October 7, 2008 at 4:41 PM
I'm not afraid to "jack up" a bratty kid! If the momma won't do it, somebody needs to put them in their place. That's what's wrong w/ some adults, nobody ever corrected them as children.
October 7, 2008 at 7:02 PM
What a punk; I'm glad you said something.
October 8, 2008 at 10:33 AM
I have to say that as innapropriate as it may have been, I am glad you said it! I also have brain can't catch up to mouth syndrome at times.
October 8, 2008 at 11:09 AM
You know what, I would've done the same thing. Seriously. The mama bear comes out in me more often than not.
October 12, 2008 at 12:40 AM
It's amazing how bullies back down when they are confronted. Hope the little jerk learned his lesson. You did what any mom would do. You'll have to learn some cool ninja moves so as to avoid those fork/eye moments.
September 14, 2013 at 11:59 AM
That kid's parents should be telling him things like that aren't ok!