DRINK Every Time they say Westminster Abbey!
No I did not stay up all night watching the Royal Wedding.I need my sleep, that's just crazy.
Plus we have a DVR.
Duh, winning!
I taxied K over to preschool, picked up my thematic drink and pressed play at the normal hour of 9:15am.
So I made some notes while I watched....
I NEED a hat, preferably cowboy, and some hawt cowboy boots too.And, now 2 hours of my life have been happily wasted.
Those feathery, side-head, satillite types are awful.
YES, I'm talking to you Beatrice and Euginie.
Will and Harry had Mickey Mouse hands with those white gloves in the car, their waves made me chuckle.
If you watch at night, you can make a drinking game out of it, "chug everytime they say Westminster Abbey" you'll get royally snockered.
I'm not a Camilla fan. She's a castle-wrecker.
Kate is gorgeous, and her sister Pippa is too, *ahem Harry, she's single*
Harry's on-again-off-again girl Chelsey looked ragged.
Kate was super blinky during the vows.
Will has a sexy deep voice.
Fast forwarding through the ceremony is key.
Fast forwarding through the carriage ride is key.
Lots of FFing to get to the kiss...good gracious!
Love that Kate says, "WOW" when she sees the crowd.
Those kids on the balcony scare the bejeezus out of me.
The kiss was a peck.
I wonder if they'll do the chicken dance or Macarena at the reception!
Will they name their first daughter Diana?
The second kiss was better!
Too Much TV is Good for My Mental Health
Sometimes I wonder why I watch so much television.Well, I think I actually know.
It's an escape.
I looked so forward to LOST and Glee last night.
LOST...well to actually get lost in the show. It's so awesome and so damn confusing at the same time. I don't think I'll ever get it, maybe with one episode left, I should stop trying.
Glee, because the music is always cool. The story lines are often far fetched, but sometimes so passionate and deep.
I watched Brothers and Sisters and cried like I normally do. That show of family, dysfunction, and life and death.
Those hours I spend in TV often tell me that I have little worries in the world. Things could be worse.
I could be stuck on an island being chased by black smoke.
TV makes me feel better.
Watching Modern Family, I often say, "I am a good mom!"
Some of the shows make me laugh until I cry. Have you seen "The Soup?" Laughing is healthy. Happy laughing is healthy.
See how healthy I am?
No more Xanax.
Um, that last non-sentence might be pushing it.
Alas, thank you boob tube for that extra self-confidence and dose of vitamin TV.
Shocking Scandal on the Bachelor...really is it though?
Seriously, this girl Rozlyn with the big melons is sneaking around with Key Grip Johnny while she's trying to win the heart of Jake?!
Can we say SLUT?
How about that look on her face when Chris was telling her all about her indiscretions!? DUH?! And she goes on to say her personal life isn't anyone's business.... huh.
Poor Jake, he's seriously hurt by this. Hubby thinks he's dumb. Dumber than a pile of bricks. I think he's a hopeless romantic (heavy on the hopeless).
The other bachelorettes...act shaken by the whole thing but should be relieved that she's gone because she probably would have been there until the end.
Whatever, good riddance (and having read some further news online today, she has a 7-year old son too, she never mentioned him and has been arrested a few times in the past!).
Like anything "reality TV" or not, I shouldn't care, but for what it's worth it makes for exciting watching, this time with wine in our hands.
I like Ali. She's darling, genuine, and maybe just a tad naive, i'm sure she asked "who the heck is Chicago, I thought it was a city!?" when they danced the night away at their private concert.
Elizabeth, who I thought was normal-ish last week wrote a long-ass letter in the tiniest of writing to Jake and proceeded to read it to him at Magic Mountain. (I can't make this stuff up!).
She goes on to say she cannot allow Jake to kiss her until it's until death do we part...at first I thought what a whack-job, but then she's a tease and leaving something for him to think about. Smart move? Maybe.
Gia...has the Joker's smile and mouth. That's all.
Vienna gets odder each show, this time telling Jake after a break up at age 18 she ran off and eloped with a guy she hardly knew to rebel. Why he's keeping her must be in his contract, but RUN JAKE AS FAST AS YOU CAN FROM HER!
Michelle is still Mayor of CrazyTown. She threatened to leave because she didn't get invited on dates this week, packed up then stayed. She went and told Jake before the rumors got to him and could have possibly scored points with him because she is still around next week.
And...well are there any other girls left on the show!!?
Yeah, I know there are, but they're not getting much screen time. Maybe that's a good thing considering the alternative.
Oh dear god, please don't let them play that song again...I can't get "On the Wings of Love" out of my head.
Flight 2010 to Gagsville, Now Boarding
...it's baaaaaaaack!
The Bachelor is on like Donkey Kong (grabbed that from you Merrie).
And oh it's so trashy it's delicious.
Doesn't take much for me to be entertained, really.
My goal in life is to laugh and have fun.
The Bachelor satisfies part of that goal and then some.
Last night during the premiere, I whined a little beforehand that hubby and I didn't have our traditional bottle of wine to share.
It helps with digesting the absolute garbage you hear from 25 girls all vying to marry Jake after knowing him for a whole 20 minutes. Oh and he's the pilot, one of Jillian's toss-aways from last season's the Bachelorette, remember? He cried.
So anyway, hilariously enough, we didn't need the liquid encouragement. We laughed and joked enough about all the crazies that literally trip over their dresses to get one on one time with this year's bachelor.
Jake. He's the "nice guy" whining that that he never gets more than a first date because girls would rather have a man who's a little more of a jerk.
I don't know....maybe it's the whole "love is beautiful, love makes the world go round" and ooh dancing unicorns and rainbows mantra he has going on, and maybe it's the unnatural way he goes about finding his soul mate on national TV...but GACK! Dude MAN UP!
Whatever, it's entertainment, I have to remember that.
So there's the typical gaggle of girls. The really pretty ones that you wonder...why can't they find a real date?! (Elizabeth from NE and Ali).
The one with the kid...Ella.
The jealous crier...Michelle.
The one with GINORMOUS boobs...Rozlyn.
...and the over-confident one with "crazy eyes" according to hubby...Vienna.
Now Jake did say he had a sexual attraction to Rozlyn already...who wouldn't, I think I do too. But, he went on to add that wasn't ALL he was looking for in a woman.
Yeah..but he did give her a rose didn't he?!
So as the show normally does, it keeps drama around for drama's sake and for ratings. He kept Michelle and Vienna.
So I religiously will DVR this planewreck and will have my wine ready for next week's episode filled with the most drama-filled season yet.
Oh and DUH...he has his shirt off in 90% of all episodes.
Who's with me?!
More of a Couch Fry than Potato
Don't get me wrong, we love our outdoor activities.But as a family, we watch a lot of tv.
What's on tv at our house?
Lots, but thanks to our DVR we can watch when we can.
Things we watch as a family:
Wipeout
The Next Food Network Star
So You Think You Can Dance
Survivor
Amazing Race
What the kids watch:
Cyberchase
iCarly
Hannah Montana
Wizards of Waverly Place
Little Einsteins
Phineas & Ferb
What Hubby loves:
IceRoad Truckers
Bear Grylls
30 Days
AxeMen
American Chopper
Jesse James is a Dead Man
Hubby and I love to watch together:
Lost
Fringe
Heroes (although I'm totally lost)
The Bachelor/ette (hubby drinks his way through the show)
Desperate Housewives
The Office
30 Rock
Arrested Development (on DVD)
Shows I love:
Friends (I DVR the reruns)
Brothers & Sisters
L.A. Ink
What do you like to watch?!
And, if you don't watch as much tv as we do, that's cool, it's all good.
You're probably a lot thinner than me too. *sigh*
;)
Too Real, Reality TV
Like many people, I've watched Jon & Kate +8 since the beginning of the show.The fascination comes from a watching couple who struggled to get pregnant find themselves with a set of twins, then a set of sextuplets.
Thank you TLC for highlighting reality at it finest.
It was a great show. There were the couple's arguments and such, but to be honest, the reality of 8 children is no easy task.
I only have 3 and some days i'm taxed like I have 10.
But, after all the tabloid accusations, the infidelity stories, and Monday night's premiere, it's time to end the show.
They have to.
The camera angles have changed. In every shot that may have Jon and Kate in it, they're looking for a tense moment, a wrong move, a mean spirited comment.
It isn't going to be about the children anymore.
It'll be about how the show reflects the media's portrayal.
End it for the kids.
It was obvious that Mady and Cara are helping mom out in a new way. Dad's not around, so they've stepped in to replace his presence. They're doing it honestly, but eventually they'll come to understand whats going on.
When they are all older do you think they'll resent having a DVD set of their parents marriage dissolving before the world's eyes!?
These are REAL people, with REAL emotions, and REAL issues that so many go through in a very private way.
But enough is enough.
The show has taken a turn, I literally cried throughout the episode. Cried when one of the birthday girls told her daddy she missed him.
This reality has become too real and too sad.
It's not the same show anymore, it can't be.
Kate's tears, no matter how her makeup looked, were real.
I wouldn't be disappointed if that was the premiere and the finale of the show, it has to end now.
TLC, let Jon and Kate deal with their family issues in private, do it for the kids!
---------
Need more reality talk, check my Bachelorette post!
Reality Bites, Literally.
Reality shows I'll never be on...Mom vs Wild (or Survivormom)--I mean these guys purposely put themselves in life-threatening situations, get bitten buy dangerous snakes, and nearly drown in frigid waters! FUN---NOT! Thank you but i'm sure I won't be lost in New Guinea anytime soon to need the tutorial of pulling a boa off my leg. I love when they say, "I just barely made it!!" Dude, why do this to yourself?! Bear Grylls is cute, don't get me wrong, I mean he strips nude in every other episode. I'll watch it, just not be on it.
Survivor--Over a month and no personal hygiene products?! Doubt it, I need my
Real Houswives of
The Bachelorette--obviously, I'm happily married. But, if I wasn't, I don't think that's the most natural setting to find a mate. Especially when you have 24 others throwing themselves at your potential man. I like to pretend when I watch that show, that it's fiction.
Wipeout--Have you seen the people bouncing off those huge red balls! It's embarassingly funny to watch. Probably hurts like a bitch to do!
American Idol--I can't sing worth a dang. Plus, Simon is such a jerk, I needn't subject myself to further public humiliation.
LA Ink--LOVE the show. Kat Von D and the crew do ah-mazing work. I love the stories behind the tattoos, they definately give me inspiration for a 3rd!! But, I could never hold a conversation while they worked, it HURTS and I tend to cry and yelp a little.
The Mom and Hub +3--again, LOVE Jon and Kate +8, but to have the cameras in the house all day, watching me spend all my free time on the computer would be a tad embarassing! Plus all the farting wouldn't make for a good show.
On the other hand, The Amazing Race I WOULD do. That would be fun! They do throw in the occasional "eat something bizarre" but I'd make Hubby do that, he's good at throwing up. I think that would be the only opportunity I'd get to travel the world too.
What about you?!
Laughing Then Crying
Please remind me, Scrubs is a comedy, right?Ha ha. Funny! A comedy.
Why is it that after every episode I'm in tears?
I watch it because I want to LAUGH, hard.
Come on!
The last episode had Elmo, Grover, Oscar the Grouch, and another Muppet on it!!
Why am I crying?
Well, like a good afterschool special, Scrubs often has these killer morals to the story that just go straight to your heart.
Not to mention the show's about a hospital, patients, and sometimes death.
But, come on, don't do this to me.
Comedy is my salve.
My escape from reality.
Considering the show was half Sesame Street anyway, My Boy caught part of the show.
The line from J.D. was as follows:
JD--(coming out of day dream mode)...What is Elmo, a seal?
*mega laughter from Hubs and I*
My Boy--(laughing, then serious) No, he's a MONKEY!
There it is.
Thank.You.Son!
Kissy, Kissy
Here we are on episode two and the tension amongst the women is palpable. It's move in day at the house and the girls are ready to get moving along with Jason.
Jason surprises the girls while they sunbathe in bikinis, without makeup, and (gasp!) hair up! I think it was very gentlemanly that Jason approaches Megan, who was outed last show as the least liked contestant by the other women, and asks if she's okay despite the announcement. He definately appreciates that she too is a mom and is different than some of the other young girls.
After a cheesy slo-mo shirt removal, Jason takes a dip and engages in some chicken-fighting with hot-dog girl Jillian. Jillian is really a strong candidate and has made the most real connection with Jason yet.
*enter the needle scratching off the record.....*
Here comes Shannon. Kept around because I feel ABC just loves some good insane drama, Shannon continues to prove she is indeed president of Stalkers Anonymous. Claiming yet again she is ready to be a mom, Jason probably is thinking, "I don't remember asking if you were," but I think he is flattered somehow by her confidence. My hubby has nick-named her Sha-NO-NO.
Two women, Melissa and Jillian both received one-on-one dates that led to lip locks that would make Hugh Hefner blush. Why must the cameras zoom in so close during this intimately awkward moments? Blimp rides and personal concerts with Robin Thicke...how normal for a first date. Sigh.
We learn later on the group date that Molly's secret talent is kissing, and lucky for her, Jason enjoys
Jason heads back to his place after a long night to find Racquel awaiting him in the limo. Surprised, he's caught off guard by her angry tone and plea to stick around.
Erika is on thin ice, she is really a heavy drinker and her behavior, as a result, becomes very catty.
Finally, Jason gets some one on one time with Stephanie. Stephanie lost her partner in a plane crash when her daughter was 10 weeks old. A Southern Belle, Stephanie isn't an immediate match with Jason in my eyes, but she has made an impact with him that seems honest.
Final 12 ladies are Megan, Nikki, Lauren, Molly, Jillian, Melissa, Naomi, Stephanie, Kari, Natalie, Shannon, and Erika.
The overall tone of the show was one of uneasiness, which is totally understandable. Have these girls really thought through the process of 25-15-12 girls dating one man all at once?! Did they think it would be easy? Luckily for us, they haven't a clue!
Won't You Take Me To...Crazytown!
My love for drama tv is bubbling over tonight with the start of the Bachelor.
This time Jason Mesnick is back to find the love of his life, after DeAnna Pappas turned him down in the final bid for her affection. I rooted for him in that last show. I also could have predicted that she'd dump Jesse as well. He was such a
But Jason stole many hearts, including mine. Not because he was hot and could bounce a quarter off his abs, but because he was a dad.
*I'll wait as you all go "AWWWW!"*
Jason has 3-year-old Ty, and this time it's not a dirty little secret, it's out in the open from the start. And, 25 women will claw their way to nab him and *insert the wicked witch voice here* his little boy too!
Which is also a little weird that he's at the house with him. With daddy downstairs mackin' with every 3rd girl. Weird.
So with hubby's glass of wine in hand, and my water bottle we sat and watched the show.
The whole intro about Jason was also a mini infomercial about abs and chest hair. Does this guy work shirtless too? We get it, he's fit. Fabulous, on to the limos...
Can we say "train wreck" class? Holy toledo where did they find this bunch, at the Crazy Carnival?
When you hear the words, "stalker," "obsessed," "hot dog toppings," and "don't you love my fake teeth" all in a matter of an hour, you know you're riding the crazy train....
Queen Crazy--and the award goes to Renee. The crazy-eyed (hubby's words) one with the Vision Boards, remember her. Um. Yeah. Because she cuts and pastes words from magazines onto cardboard, all her dreams come true. Thankfully she got the boot, probably because she said Vision Board about 82 times and Jason was getting scared.
Boobs Award--this goes to Nikki. Nikki got Jason's first impression rose based solely on her cleavage I think. It was right in his face all show and well it would have been fitting if he'd stuck the flower in her dress.
Dental Dork--the dental hygenist steps out of the limo and all you see are these grotesque fake teeth. Ha ha good one. Introducing Shannon. Later we see her chatting one on one with Jason rattling off his personal info, social security number, and birthdates of his brothers, all the while saying the stalker's motto, "I'm totally NOT a stalker." She also adds that she is ready to have children after the end of the rose ceremony if he was in. Freakishly enough she was given a rose at the end of the show. Maybe ABC said, lets keep her for some added ratings, we'll throw in Disney passes for Ty.
Towards the end of the show, a twist within a twist occurs when the ladies are asked to vote OFF their least favorite girl in the house. Jason is looking shocked as they ultimately chose Megan, a mom of a 14-month-old boy. He had just said he connected with her.
Chris then tells the crowd, PSYCHE, Megan isn't going home she is actually getting a rose to stay. *enter Nelson's laugh* WAHHAH!
In the classiest possible way, Megan turns to the crowd and gives a few words of her own to the likes of B****** or A******* or something and then accepts the rose. I bet Jason fell in love with her on the spot.
As they scrolled to future footage of the show we see DeAnna back and telling Jason she's made a huge mistake! Like we didn't see that coming. Flash to Jason on a balcony crying.
The B Train to Crazyville leaves every Monday at 8 on ABC.
I Squealed to Ellen's Receptionist
Oh you know, just a little trip.Just me and the Hubby.
Couple days, no biggie.
Just going to the ELLEN DEGENERES SHOW!
No need to get excited.
It's only being taped in LAS VEGAS! At Caesar's Palace! In the Colosseum!
OMG.
Hubby knows that I've longed to see her show. Heading down to L.A. and attending a taping would be so cool.
Then, I saw the she was offering tickets to a special taping in Vegas. I got this crazy thrill of an idea that we would go. We'd only been one other time and it was a quick stop-over on the way to Arizona.
I filled out the form at Ellen's site and thought, it would be cool to go, but tickets are limited and I didn't want to get my hopes up.
All week I kept telling Hubby, we should really try answering the phone this week, Ellen might call.
Yeah, caller ID is our best friend and we rarely answer the phone.
Then Saturday morning I got the call. The girl on the line was just one of the hired help, but I squealed like I was talking to Ellen herself! I think I thanked her about 40 times, she was probably glad to say goodbye.
EEEEEEEE!!! I cannot wait, I love Ellen. I love her show. I love that she dances to cool music. I love her comedy. I'm so curious who her guest will be! I am going to guess and say Elton John and Bette Midler, only because they are currently headlining at Caesar's. Maybe the Blue Man Group will show up! *SQUEAL*
I could care less if the hotel housekeeping staff were her featured guests, she would make it so worth the trip, and it would be totally hilarious!
Confession Time...
I loved the show Three's Company!I did, it was so funny! Jack, Janet, and Chrissy/Terri/Cindy, those cards. I always wanted one girl and one guy roommate.
Then there was Larry, the perv-y kinda friend of Jack's always scamming on the ladies.
The Roper's were funny. How it was so taboo to have guys and girls living together platonically and how Jack had to be gay for it to be okay. Mrs. Roper secretely new he wasn't, she was cool. I loved her MuuMuu flowy-dress getups.
Then
It was a GREAT show!
In the 80's I had my trusty cassette-tape player and a blank tape and I would audio record the shows. Yes, I did.
When my family would take a car ride, I would listen (without headphones people!) to the shows in the car. That was my entertainment.
Don't feel sorry for me, I loved it. I had some of those shows memorized!
Ahh, to have a drink at the Regal Beagle!
If you want to reminisce a bit, here are some bloopers...
My Hubby likes to tease me about it now. Like Dukes of Hazzard and Chips were any better. He can only dream as being as cool as Ponch or Bo Duke. ;)
Dare I Get Political?
So many times I've wanted to post this...and so many times I didn't, but we're all entititled to our opinion.[nervous giggle].I LOVE watching Ellen.
She is the funniest female comedian I know.
I even loved her t.v. show until they yanked it because she came out.
Obviously her talk show is now a smashing hit, so there's a little in your face action.
Did you see the episode with the Hawaii Chair?! Pee your pants funny!
And, of course her wedding to Portia DeRossi this summer was brilliantly captured!
No, I have nothing wrong with their marriage being recognized by the state of California, more power to them, and how can you deny happiness?? Who's business it of anyone else who you marry and what sexual orientation they are? Just sayin'.
Ellen with John McCain...
Oh and there's this from Jen at the Daily Mish Mash....hee hee!
No need for a brawl, just my view with a hint of humor. I'll respect yours if you respect mine.
